just to let everyone know, i've decided what i'm going to do. see at first i was just going to take dyl down, and then find a site to host my shorts and what not. i've since decided that i'm just getting a new lj. dyl is no more. i won't be writing dyl. i will, however, be starting a new fic that involves roz/tay. i'll also be doing a lot more shorts. a lot more. anyways, it seems these days i've needed, craved even, change in my life. i've made so many changes lately in a lot of things. and i've decided to change lj's for my fics. breaking away from 'ineverywordisay' is like getting rid of dyl for me. i'm pulling myself away from that. now to some of you it probably seems like i'm just going around making new lj's for the lj's i already have (and i guess thats what i'm doing) but i just need change. some may not understand that, but thats okay. i just wanted to let you guys know what i'm doing with dyl and stuff. soooo...even though nothing is posted there yet i'll go ahead and give you my new fic journal. (i swear i'm addicted to making lj's)

invisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrs

feel free to go ahead and add it. i won't be posting anything there for a few days. nothing too soon. but something will be posted by this time next week.

ten bonus points to the person who can tell me where the name came from. ten thousand more to those of you who can tell me how i thought of it. it'll take some work

so...after doing some thinking, i've decided that its very much possible that i will not continue writing "damn your love". now, in all honesty, i don't think the story is that great anyways. i like the plot of the story, the idea behind it. and i think that if given the proper attention, time, and well...dedicated maybe it could be a really good story. but the thing is, i've written and rewritten this story twice now. and i'm just tired of that. every time i write a new chapter, i end up unhappy with it. with the outcome, with the response to it, with everything. i end up frustrated, and wanting to throw it out.
so basically i'm saying, i don't think dyl is going any further then where its gone. if it does, which probably won't happen but who knows, then it'll need some serious rewriting. there are parts of this story that i love. lines, and ideas that were concocted during long sleepless nights on aim. but there are parts i hate. things that were just thrown in there to make it longer, more appealing. first of all i hate melodie. i hate her character, i hate how she is, i hate that she's even a part of this story. i do however love roz and tay. and the way they are with each other. i guess i just don't believe this story would be any good with out the melodie aspect. or would it? which blows because i really don't like her. i mean i haven't even written her into the story in so many chapters.

i'm...i love writing shorts. i have so many shorts i have written, but haven't shared because i'm so damn anal about dyl and getting a new chapter out. i want to dedicate my writing time to something i truly believe in. something i want to continue doing and dyl just isn't that. i mean seriously, when it comes to dyl, my writing has lacked. i'm a better writer then that but my passion and dedication just aren't in dyl. its all faked and bullshitted until the chapter is completed and i can breathe a sigh of relief. you see, i see writing as a passion for me. i love it, and given the chance i can be really great at it. when i want that. i just don't want that with dyl. i have so many ideas running through my head, but they're all stiffled or put on hold so i can write for dyl. and i know, i don't even write that often for it right? but i do. i'm also writing for it, it just literally takes that long for me to get something out that i'm happy with because i hate this so much.

this came out of nowhere, or at least it seems that way i'm sure. but it didn't. i've been thinking about this for a long time, and putting it off. but here it is. i went to continue writing the next chapter and i just couldn't do it. three pages in, and i deleted the whole thing because i just wasn't happy with it. in short, i really want to write things that not only am i happy with but that i believe in. things that you guys are going to want to read, look forwarding to reading. and i just don't think thats the case with dyl.

also, i plan to move from this lj to a regular site soon. whether dyl is put up there or not, i'm not sure. i guess that comes down to you guys. and i promise i'm not going to be hurt if you don't want me to continue with it. just know that if i do continue it, there will be a serious rewrite. now if thats the case, and the rewrite happens i'd like to know what parts you guys really like of the story. but like i said, at this point i just want to take any virtual evidence of dyl and kill it all.

anyways thats my news.info. stuff. other then that i'm working on a short that i kind of love. that is all.

yea so heres chapter 13 of damn your love. i'm really, really, sorry it took me this long to update the story. i don't really have an excuse other then you know lack of creativity. every time i tried to write a new chapter for it, it ended up being a short story. oops? hehe. anyways i hope you guys enjoy it.

( breathing in rhythms and waves. )

update on self:
i'll be mia for a while, a few weeks at the least, but have no fear i will be back as soon as i can. while i'm "gone" i'll definitely finish the next chapter (or two. we'll see) to damn your love. i know everyone is waiting on that to be updated hehe.
i'll also have a few short stories finished for you guys, i hope you're enjoying those because they're filling up the huge creative gap that is NOT there for dyl at the moment. or wasn't because i'm on a roll now. anyways i'll be back, so i hope you guys keep reading.

so... i've been doing some writing. but not for ineverywordisay. i"m not really sure whats going on there, I mean I know where I want it to go and I've got some of the next chapter written but I'm having a hard time finding the inspiration, creativity or time to actually extend the chapter to what I want it to be. I know I know. How can I find time to write something else if I can't find time for dyl? I don't know really. I saw a hansonsecret earlier, that just triggered something in me. weird i know. and i wanted to write. and so I did. and this is what I came up with. Keep in mind its 3 in the a.m. and I'm probably not completely sane right now :p ten thousand bonus points to those who can tell me what/where the title is from ^__^

( wear it like a label... )

i have no idea why i did this. IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH DAMN YOUR LOVE. but here it is. a short piece of...fiction that has been months, literally, in the making. it was originally written for a challenge thing but i didn't make the deadline and decided to forget the whole idea. now, two months later, after changing what the ending would be and then changing it back and then changing it again; i present it to you. the reader. and god, i hope its better then what i write for damn your love because i love it. i mean, not like that but I mean, for some reason...this is the first thing i've written that i've liked...a lot. so i hope you do too. and um... i told you it'd be a jamie soon not a hanson soon haha (you know who you are :) )

( you can try the best you can...said ooooh, ooohhh, oooohhhh. )

( i gave up everything to love only you )

( The truth escaped me twice last night )

( i'm caught between. myself and me )

( wish you could hide in a big black hole, sell all your pain ten fold. )