damn your love

ineverywordisay @ 2006-07-29T16:40:00

2006-07-29T20:45:46Z

just to let everyone know, i've decided what i'm going to do. see at first i was just going to take dyl down, and then find a site to host my shorts and what not. i've since decided that i'm just getting a new lj. dyl is no more. i won't be writing dyl. i will, however, be starting a new fic that involves roz/tay. i'll also be doing a lot more shorts. a lot more. anyways, it seems these days i've needed, craved even, change in my life. i've made so many changes lately in a lot of things. and i've decided to change lj's for my fics. breaking away from 'ineverywordisay' is like getting rid of dyl for me. i'm pulling myself away from that. now to some of you it probably seems like i'm just going around making new lj's for the lj's i already have (and i guess thats what i'm doing) but i just need change. some may not understand that, but thats okay. i just wanted to let you guys know what i'm doing with dyl and stuff. soooo...even though nothing is posted there yet i'll go ahead and give you my new fic journal. (i swear i'm addicted to making lj's)

invisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrsinvisblemonstrs

feel free to go ahead and add it. i won't be posting anything there for a few days. nothing too soon. but something will be posted by this time next week.

ten bonus points to the person who can tell me where the name came from. ten thousand more to those of you who can tell me how i thought of it. it'll take some work

news, info. stuff like that.

2006-07-26T16:51:58Z

so...after doing some thinking, i've decided that its very much possible that i will not continue writing "damn your love". now, in all honesty, i don't think the story is that great anyways. i like the plot of the story, the idea behind it. and i think that if given the proper attention, time, and well...dedicated maybe it could be a really good story. but the thing is, i've written and rewritten this story twice now. and i'm just tired of that. every time i write a new chapter, i end up unhappy with it. with the outcome, with the response to it, with everything. i end up frustrated, and wanting to throw it out.
so basically i'm saying, i don't think dyl is going any further then where its gone. if it does, which probably won't happen but who knows, then it'll need some serious rewriting. there are parts of this story that i love. lines, and ideas that were concocted during long sleepless nights on aim. but there are parts i hate. things that were just thrown in there to make it longer, more appealing. first of all i hate melodie. i hate her character, i hate how she is, i hate that she's even a part of this story. i do however love roz and tay. and the way they are with each other. i guess i just don't believe this story would be any good with out the melodie aspect. or would it? which blows because i really don't like her. i mean i haven't even written her into the story in so many chapters.

i'm...i love writing shorts. i have so many shorts i have written, but haven't shared because i'm so damn anal about dyl and getting a new chapter out. i want to dedicate my writing time to something i truly believe in. something i want to continue doing and dyl just isn't that. i mean seriously, when it comes to dyl, my writing has lacked. i'm a better writer then that but my passion and dedication just aren't in dyl. its all faked and bullshitted until the chapter is completed and i can breathe a sigh of relief. you see, i see writing as a passion for me. i love it, and given the chance i can be really great at it. when i want that. i just don't want that with dyl. i have so many ideas running through my head, but they're all stiffled or put on hold so i can write for dyl. and i know, i don't even write that often for it right? but i do. i'm also writing for it, it just literally takes that long for me to get something out that i'm happy with because i hate this so much.

this came out of nowhere, or at least it seems that way i'm sure. but it didn't. i've been thinking about this for a long time, and putting it off. but here it is. i went to continue writing the next chapter and i just couldn't do it. three pages in, and i deleted the whole thing because i just wasn't happy with it. in short, i really want to write things that not only am i happy with but that i believe in. things that you guys are going to want to read, look forwarding to reading. and i just don't think thats the case with dyl.

also, i plan to move from this lj to a regular site soon. whether dyl is put up there or not, i'm not sure. i guess that comes down to you guys. and i promise i'm not going to be hurt if you don't want me to continue with it. just know that if i do continue it, there will be a serious rewrite. now if thats the case, and the rewrite happens i'd like to know what parts you guys really like of the story. but like i said, at this point i just want to take any virtual evidence of dyl and kill it all.

anyways thats my news.info. stuff. other then that i'm working on a short that i kind of love. that is all.

chapter 13: breathing in rhythms and waves.

2006-04-11T21:20:59Z

yea so heres chapter 13 of damn your love. i'm really, really, sorry it took me this long to update the story. i don't really have an excuse other then you know lack of creativity. every time i tried to write a new chapter for it, it ended up being a short story. oops? hehe. anyways i hope you guys enjoy it.

*Rozelyn’s point of view*

I sat in the middle of our kitchen, sipping a cup of lukewarm black coffee. I could hear Zac snoring from the couch in the living room where he had fallen asleep the night before. I'd been up for only an hour, but I was already annoyed with having him in my home. It wasn't that we didn't have enough living space for the four of us in the apartment, because quite frankly we did. It just seemed to me that every little thing I did or said seemingly got on Zac's nerves and he felt the need to constantly voice that. I wanted him to like me, but I saw no reason to completely change who I was just for him. So, I didn't.

"Hey," Taylor said, walking into the room. I smiled at him, getting out of my chair and walking to where he stood against the counter. "Sleep well?" he questioned, wrapping his arms around my waist. I shrugged, resting my head against his chest. I was so short compared to him, I thought.

"Anything planned for the day?" I questioned him, staring out the window in our kitchen.

"Uh, yes and no. I figured Zac and I could screw around and write some music or something. But there's nothing definitely planned."

"Ah," I said, pulling away and walking out of the kitchen towards our bedroom.

"Hey, where are you going?" he asked, following me down the hallway. I looked back at him and smiled. He caught up with me just as I reached our bed. Grabbing me around the waist he spun me around and kissed my lips roughly. "Now, I hope you had no plans on actually lying down and going back to sleep." He whispered in a husky voice. I shrugged, backing up towards the bed. He smiled, knowing what was going to happen next.

*Zac's point of view*

THUD. I woke up as my body hit the hard wood floor of Taylor's apartment. Rozelyn's moans had startled me from my sleep, causing me to fall from the couch. I scowled, surveying the room lit only by the morning sun. It was too early to be woken up, especially like that. Shaking my head, I stood up and made my way through the hall, past their room and into the guest bedroom. Andrew was asleep on the small fold out cot Taylor had set up in the room. I flung myself onto the full sized bed that was pushed against the far wall. If I have to listen to them have sex all day I'm going to ram my foot in his ass, I thought to myself. I laid there for a moment, hoping that they were finished. When I hadn't heard anything for a few minutes I closed my eyes, letting the comfortable feeling of sleep take over my limp body.

"Oh, god. Taylor."

My eyes fluttered open, hoping my mind had merely been playing tricks on me and that they weren't really still going at it. Roz moaned again, this time only slightly quieter. I felt like crying. Didn't those two have any respect for their house guests?

*Taylor's point of view*

"Jesus. Taylooorrrrrr!" Rozelyn moaned, as I moved within her. I smiled, moving a little faster with each passing second. She arched her back, as she'd already done several times, digging her fingernails deeper into the sensitive skin on my back.

"You're beautiful," I whispered into her ear, as I slowed my pace. Her breathe was labored, as mine was becoming, and tiny beads of sweat had formed on her forehead. I could feel her chest rise and fall against mine, her heart beating wildly from excitement.

*Zac's point of view*
"What the fuck," I mumbled, pulling a pillow over my head in hopes of maybe blocking out the noise of two twenty something's going at it like dogs in heat. Roz moaned again, causing me to throw the pillow across the room. I rolled off the bed, planting my feet on the floor and flinging the door open.

"You think you two can give it a rest for a while?" I screeched, pounding twin fists on the wooden door. "Some of us are trying to get some sleep here."

"Huh?" Taylor asked, sounding out of breathe.

"Give it a damn rest!" I yelled back.

"Wait. Hold on man, I'm coming." God I wish he hadn't said that. I wasn't sure if he meant he was walking to the door, or if...I turned around and walked back to the guest room, shaking my head in disbelief.

*Taylor’s point of view*

"mmm," I heard Roz moan, arching her back one more time before I came inside her. I smiled down at her, putting my forehead to hers. We lay there for a few minutes, our naked bodies intertwined, breathing in a rhythm that matched our slowing heart beats.

"I should go see what he was yelling about," I said, pulling myself up from the bed and walking to the dresser to get a pair of boxers. She nodded, her eyes half open. "Go back to sleep, I'll make you some breakfast when I'm done talking to him." I said, leaning over and kissing her forehead before I turned and walked out into the hallway. "Dude." I said, walking into the guest room and sitting down on the bed that Zac was lying across.

"Dude." he said back, giving me the evil eye.

"What?" I asked, unable to control the smile that had spread across my lips. We'd always been in competition with each other when we were younger, always willing to play the game of 'lets see who gets laid more', and even after all these years we still were jealous of the play that the other brother was getting.

"What?" he asked, his voice cracking. "What?" he repeated, even louder this time. "What.The.Hell. man. It's 9:45 in the fucking morning. You two couldn't wait until, oh you know, a decent hour to screw? Some of us are trying to sleep. And thanks to your little girlfriend in there, I now have a huge knot on my head from hitting it on your damn living room floor."

"Hey, chill okay." I said, holding my hands out in front of me. "I'm sorry. Things have been...weird around here lately and I've gotta take what I can get, when I get it." He rolled his eyes, a look of disgust on his face.

"That doesn't matter Tay, if you're gonna have sex while I'm staying with you then maybe you should invest in some sort of muzzle for your loud mouthed bitch."

"WHOA." I said, sounding louder and more angry then I had intended. "Don't talk about her like that. And I'm serious. We won't have sex while you're trying to sleep again, okay? But you are not, and I repeat NOT, to ever talk about her like that again. You got it?" I said, eyeing him. Zac nodded, rolling his eyes once more at me.

"God. You’re so whipped that you don't even realize what kind of person she is." He sound, no conviction what so ever in his voice.

"Stop. Just stop. I know exactly who she is. The problem here, little brother, is that you don't. Despite how much you wanna believe that you do." And with that I got up and walked out of the bedroom and through the house to the kitchen. I hate my little brother sometimes.

ineverywordisay @ 2006-01-09T14:02:00

2006-01-09T19:03:42Z

update on self:
i'll be mia for a while, a few weeks at the least, but have no fear i will be back as soon as i can. while i'm "gone" i'll definitely finish the next chapter (or two. we'll see) to damn your love. i know everyone is waiting on that to be updated hehe.
i'll also have a few short stories finished for you guys, i hope you're enjoying those because they're filling up the huge creative gap that is NOT there for dyl at the moment. or wasn't because i'm on a roll now. anyways i'll be back, so i hope you guys keep reading.

did someone call for two orders of heartbreak with a plate of hot steamy sex on the side? i hope so.

2005-12-17T08:39:33Z

so... i've been doing some writing. but not for ineverywordisay. i"m not really sure whats going on there, I mean I know where I want it to go and I've got some of the next chapter written but I'm having a hard time finding the inspiration, creativity or time to actually extend the chapter to what I want it to be. I know I know. How can I find time to write something else if I can't find time for dyl? I don't know really. I saw a hansonsecret earlier, that just triggered something in me. weird i know. and i wanted to write. and so I did. and this is what I came up with. Keep in mind its 3 in the a.m. and I'm probably not completely sane right now :p ten thousand bonus points to those who can tell me what/where the title is from ^__^

Wear it like a label

I stared up at him through tears, hoping against hope that he hadn't just whispered the words that I knew had come from his beautiful lips. A sob escaped from my mouth, seeming miles away from where I was at that precise moment. Every noise in the room suddenly sounded distant, muffled. I closed my eyes, tasting the saline that had rolled down my cheeks and onto my newly chapped lips. Things would never be as good as they were five minutes before he muttered the words "I never really loved you" carelessly into the stiff air that had filled the room. I stepped back, hoping to remove myself from the situation before it got any worse. How could someone string you along for as long as he'd strung me, and not once begin to truly care about you?

"Listen, it just...you were just... this whole thing was just a mistake okay?" He said, his eyes silently pleading me to not throw a fit. "It never should've happened."

"...And you couldn't come to that conclusion a year ago?" I asked, backing further towards the door of the tiny hotel room. Swearing to myself that I'd never love again, I turned toward the door and reached out for the handle. I hesitated, turning my head to the side. I could see him out of the corner of my eye, staring nonchalantly back at me. "I want you gone by the time I come back." I said, my voice weak and my eyes still brimming with tears. I ran down the length of the hallway of the dimly lit Comfort Inn, towards the exit door that led to the outdoor pool area. I pushed through the doors, not caring if anyone had been on the other side of them. Nicholas had been my life for the past fourteen months, and before him my life was nothing short of mundane.

Sitting on the grown against a post, I sobbed quietly into my hands, only stopping once to rummage through the bag that still hung loosely over my left shoulder. I found the pack of Marlboro Reds and the blue lighter I'd had since four months previous when I'd taken it from my brothers end table. After I'd had it lit I took a long drag from it, filling the night air with just as much smoke that seemed to be filling my lungs. I felt like I was suffocating, my entire world crashing down around me in seconds. I sobbed louder, holding the cigarette in one hand, the other covering my face. How could I have been so ignorant? I asked myself, before I realized that the heart only sees what it wants to. I closed my eyes, shutting out every star that seemed to be staring back at me with just as much intensity as they'd always had.

"Um, do you have a cigarette I could bum?" A voice came from somewhere in front of me, startling me out of the dark world that hid behind my eyelids and only appeared on nights like this one. I looked up, searching for the owner of the voice I'd just heard. My eyes lay rested on him, standing there in front of me in all of his glory. Nearly 6'3" with shaggy blonde hair and blue eyes shining like they truly were pieces of gods blue sky, I had to hold my breath to keep from gasping out loud. I reached up and began wiping the tears away from my eyes and off of my cheeks, hoping he hadn't noticed how wet my cheeks already were.

"Don't..." he said, his voice trailing off into the night air as he held his hand out in front of him. "There's no need." I stared at him in confusion. Hadn't he just asked me for a cigarette?
"There's something completely beautiful about you, right here and right now with your tear stained cheeks." He said, moving closer to me. I stared at him, slowly reaching into the bag that had since been discarded at my feet for the pack of cigarettes that I knew were lying only centimeters from the opening.

"Um, here" I said, handing a cigarette to him wondering where he'd come from and if he had been out the whole time and I just hadn't noticed. He smiled at me, taking it from my hands and then sitting down on the cool concrete next to me.

"Thanks," he said, his eyes burning into mine as if he could read my very thought. I nodded, turning my attention to the ground in front of me. "Ugh, do you have a lighter as well?" He said, laughing lowly. I nodded again, reaching my hand back into the bag and retrieving the blue lighter. "heh. Thanks. I'm only a little unprepared huh." he said, taking the lighter into his hands. I shivered as his fingertips grazed across my skin. His touch was burning hot, searing into my skin. "Cold?" he questioned. I shrugged, taking another hit from the cigarette that I had left abandoned in my right hand. We sat in silence for a few minutes, neither of us knowing each other. That didn't seem to matter though, at least not at the time.

"So," the unnamed man next to me said, letting out a breath full of smoke into the blackened sky. "Are you okay?" he asked, seeming more genuine then anyone I'd met in a long time. I laughed lowly, thinking of a way to answer his question. He'd already witnessed me crying, and had obviously caught onto the heartbreak that I inevitably reeked of. I remained quiet, for mere seconds, searching the sky for an unseen answer.

"Not exactly." I finally spoke, my voice barely audible.

"I didn't figure you were." He looked at me, stray pieces of blonde hair falling in front of his eyes. "I'm Taylor by the way."

"Aubrey Marie," I said, staring at the inches of cement in between us, hesitant to look up at him. I could hear him breathing, taking in the air that had quickly turned far to chilly for my liking.

"Heartbreak?" he asked, startling me. I could see him staring at me from the corner of my eye, as I nodded in regret. Regret for everything that had happened in my life, regret for letting the last year and some odd months slip past me in ignorance. Regret for what I'd let myself become. "Well, if it makes you feel any better that's the same thing I'm feeling right now." I looked up into his eyes, for the first time since I had when I first saw him. It was suddenly clear through those blue eyes how much hurt he was holding within him. It only seemed fitting that we'd find each other then, right there on that night. Both of us completely broken, yet him trying to be completely strong for someone he'd never met. Seeming unaffected by the weight of heartbreak. The weight that was inevitable to feel once your world had come crashing to the floor with a halt. I continued to look at him, my eyes apologetic for something I had no effect or control over. "Looks like rain," he commented, tearing away from my stare and looking at the sky that had now been littered with clouds dark enough to keep the world in blackness for days. Neither of us would have noticed them had they not completely covered the moon and washed away any light that had been previously illuminating the area around the pool. I nodded, putting the last of my cigarette out onto the ground.

"Feel like a cup of coffee?" he questioned, standing up slowly. "I'm not really up for being alone right now, and I somehow doubt you are as well." I didn't really have to think about what he'd just offered, I knew that being alone would be the worst thing for me. For every minute I was alone, there'd be more and more destruction. He reached out, knowing my answer before hearing it, and grabbed my hand. I pulled myself up, grabbing my bag and following him to the other side of the hotel to an 'exit only' door that had been propped open with a small box.

Once inside the room, well lit by a lamp that sat on a desk against the far wall, I breathed a heavy sigh. It was only now that he'd be able to see the toll that years of being shut out and abandoned could take on a person. Yet, he stared at me as he had outside. Full of wonder, and sadness at the same time. "So...Taylor..."I said, using his name for the first time since he'd offered it. He looked at me, lips pressed together, eyebrows raised waiting for me to go on. "how'd you know it was heartbreak?" I said, wanting to take back my question as soon as I'd let it slip from my tongue. It was obvious how he knew.

"You wear it like a label..." he stated, turning on his heel and walking towards the small table that held the coffee pot. I'd always been easily read, which in the end proved to be more of a bad thing then a good thing.

--

We sat talking for more then three hours, spilling our hearts over lukewarm hotel coffee that tasted more like cardboard and Styrofoam than anything. I'd cried more then once, barely able to tell him the things that had led up to our meeting. And he stayed calm and understanding through it all, his blue eyes willing me to continue talking. To tell him everything I'd never told anyone else before. And he did the same, telling me everything he'd wanted to voice to those constantly around him until his voice cracked and wore thin from saying too much in too little a time.

When he was finally done talking, he sipped his now cold coffee scrunching up his face as he did so. I smiled a little, for the first time since he'd asked me for a cigarette; and he'd noticed. I felt his hand on my cheek, stroking my skin with his thumb. I turned my face into his hand, kissing his palm gently. He smiled then, moving closer to where I sat on his hotel bed.

His lips were warm against mine, feeling like silk. They fit with mine perfectly, as he probably knew they would. I allowed him to kiss me for a few minutes, enjoying the feeling of him merely inches away from me. When he did pull away, I let out a sigh. What was I doing? I'd only come to his hotel room with him, with only the intentions of a cup of coffee or two. And now, he basically had me to where he'd be able to do anything. Though I probably could have stopped him there, and left his room only to return to mine; knowing full well it'd be completely empty with no one waiting for me to return to them. Yet, I was unable to move away from him as he leaned in to kiss me again.

A kissed turned into several kisses. Seconds turning into minutes as his lips never parted from mine. And within no time, he had me lying on my back, him half on top of me. His kisses were too passionate for me to turn away, his words sweet and whispered as if spoken louder they would ring false. I worked my hands up his back until the fingers of my left hand were tangled in the hair at the nape of his neck, soft and untamed. He smiled against my lips, deepening the kiss as he began to pull my shirt over my head.

In minutes every piece of clothing had been discarded to the floor, strewn across the space between the bed and the window. I looked into his eyes as he entered me, sliding in with ease. I arched my back slightly, feeling his length deep inside of my body. He smiled, his lips curling over his teeth. He rocked back in forth inside of me, bringing me to completely ecstasy more then three times. By the fourth time I had orgasmed, his pace had begun to pick up. The rocking motions continued, faster and deeper each time. I arched my back and lifted my hips to meet his time after time. He came within minutes of my last orgasm, finally collapsing against my chest. His breath was labored, his hair wet with perspiration. I took in everything about him. His scent, the way his lips felt against mine, the way his body still smelled of soap and cologne even after our eventful night together. He seemed so completely perfect at that moment.

I drifted off into sleep minutes later, dreaming of oceans and sunsets, and skies that were only littered with the brightest stars. I awoke the next morning, the sun pouring over my still naked body. I looked at the clock on the night stand next to the hotel bed. It read 11:11. I smiled to myself, secretly making a wish that I'd wake up every morning as I had that one. I felt his arms pull me down next to him, the warmth from his body filling every bit of me. "Mmmm," he breathed in, his face buried in the back of my neck. I sighed, content for the moment and happy with just lying in bed with his arms around me all day.

---
comments???

ineverywordisay @ 2005-11-29T04:51:00

2005-11-29T10:04:45Z

i have no idea why i did this. IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH DAMN YOUR LOVE. but here it is. a short piece of...fiction that has been months, literally, in the making. it was originally written for a challenge thing but i didn't make the deadline and decided to forget the whole idea. now, two months later, after changing what the ending would be and then changing it back and then changing it again; i present it to you. the reader. and god, i hope its better then what i write for damn your love because i love it. i mean, not like that but I mean, for some reason...this is the first thing i've written that i've liked...a lot. so i hope you do too. and um... i told you it'd be a jamie soon not a hanson soon haha (you know who you are :) )

---------------------
I leaned against the back wall of the elevator, unsure of whether I should actually be there or not. I felt eyes wander over me, looking me up and down. Shifting my weight from my right to my left foot I moved my gaze slowly up the elevator door silently willing it to open. It had been months since I felt this nervous, and most likely longer since I had a pair of eyes as gorgeous as his looking me over. I returned his gaze, still unsure of the night that lie ahead of us. He smiled, stepping closer as to fill in the gap of space between us. He smelled of expensive cologne, but the aroma of vodka and cloves was easily detected as he leaned over to press his soft lips to mine.

I only knew his name, Jordan, but he seemed so familiar.

He pressed his lips against mine harder, slowly parting them with the tip of his tongue. A million thoughts had run through my mind from the moment he had suggested that I go back to his hotel room with him, none of them being a logical reason as to why I shouldn't; other then the obvious fact that we didn't know each other to very well. The door dinged, opening slowly to reveal a dim hallway, carpeted and wallpapered. Jordan grabbed my hand, pulling me through the hallway to his room. He stopped in front of the painted white door that had the numbers 593 painted in black, pulling out a key card and swiping it through the slit to unlock the door. When the green light blinked on he turned the handle, anxious to get inside. I inhaled the air in the room, stale cigarettes and the same expensive cologne he was wearing.

"So, make yourself comfortable." He said, giving me a some what devilish smile. I gave him a shy smile in return, hesitantly sitting down on the edge of the bed. What was I doing here, I thought surveying the room as he took his coat and shoes off. "Would you like a drink?" he questioned, walking over to the bed where I sat.

"No, that's alright." I answered him, feeling all sorts of anticipation rising up within me.

"Ah, come on," he said playfully, "it's more fun when you've got at least a bit of a buzz going on." And there was that smile again, the one that had won me over in the end. It was the make it or break it smile, one of those smiles you just can't say no to. You know the ones.
I let my smile grow wider, rolling my eyes at him as he lay down next to me.

"Hey," he said softly, grabbing my wrist gently. "Lay down here." he continued holding my wrist, slowly pulling me down into a laying position. I looked over at him, flashing a nervous smile. He returned it, his not so nervous though, and leaned over to kiss me again. I let him part my lips with his tongue, exploring the depths of my mouth as my tongue slowly collided with his over and over again. Our kisses continued, slowly getting a little deeper. Kiss after kiss, they went from soft, hesitant and slow to passionate and deep. But no sooner then they had Jordan began to make them a little rougher. So rough that after a few minutes of this he accidentally bit my lip.

"Ah!" I half screamed, startled at the sudden pain that had shot through my lip.

"I am so sorry," he said, pushing his blonde hair out of his eyes. "Are you okay?" he questioned, watching me as I sat up , touching my index finger to my lip. I nodded, turning to look at him. He put his head down slightly, cocking it to the side and looking up at me through the hair that had fallen back down in front of his face. I smiled, lying back down next to him. Breathing a sigh of relief, he leaned forward to where his lips were right above my ear. "Why don't I turn on some music," he whispered in a husky voice, his breathe tickling my earlobe. I nodded, watching him stand up and walk across the room to the desk on which a small black radio sat. He flipped through the stations, each song letting out a different sound then the last, until finally he came to a station he seemed content with.

3A.M. by Matchbox Twenty was playing, and I began to mouth the words as he made his way back to the bed. "Oh so you know this song," he teased lying down yet again and running his fingers through my hair. I smiled, enjoying the feeling of him just inches away from me. His eyes shone a beautiful blue, like endless miles of ocean that could swallow you whole if you weren't careful. I bit my lower lip gently, hoping he'd continue his kisses before I went insane. He practically read my mind, as only seconds later his lips where on mine once again. They fit perfectly with mine, slowing pushing me to want more and more. I moaned into the kiss, feeling him smile against my lips as I did. Grabbing the bottom of my black shirt, he slowly pushed it up to reveal my stomach. I shivered a little as his hands ran up and down my side, turning me on more then I already was. He shifted his weight, moving on top of me in one swift movement as I tangled my fingers through his soft hair. His kisses moved from my lips down to my neck, and then down again to my collarbone. Before I had time to even think about what was going on I felt his hands grab the hem of my shirt again and pull it up over my head. He smiled, sneaking a peak of my pale white skin as he resumed his rough kisses to my lips. I raised my head up off of the bed slightly, running the fingers on my left hand over his stubbly chin. He smiled through the kiss, and began to suck on my lower lip. My one weakness. I was at a loss, suddenly, of what to do with my hands so I moved them down to his shirt slowly unbuttoning it. Finally when the last button was undone I reached up, sliding it off his broad shoulders to reveal a very fit semi tanned stomach and chest. I ran my hand over his chest, suddenly very very glad that I had agreed to leave the bar we had met in with him. One by one the kisses we shared grew deeper and deeper, until only minutes later we were both lying on the bed in next to nothing. I looked up into his beautiful eyes, wondering if he did this all the time. The way his hands ran over my body, the way he knew just the right time to turn those soft kisses into something a little rougher, only brought me to think he knew this territory all too well. He smiled again, a big toothy grin this time, leaning in a bit closer to my face.

"Are you ready for this?" he questioned me, sending chills down my spin from just the sound of his incredibly sexy voice. I nodded, letting my eyes wander over his perfect body. He still looked so familiar. He outstretched his arm to the nightstand, knocking me in the head in the process. "Owwww." I said, a little confused as to what had happened at first.

Jordan stared at me, his eyes wide. "I'm so sorry babe," he said, steadying himself above me and leaning over to kiss my forehead. I smiled up at him, knowing he hadn't meant to hit me; or at least I hoped. He reached back over to the nightstand again, this time careful as to not hit me. Pulling the drawer open he reached his right hand in and pulled out a condom. I bit my lower lip for what seemed like the twentieth time that night, watching him as he pushed the drawer shut and leaned back on his knees. His blue eyes roamed over my upper body, a smile spreading across his face as he leaned over to kiss me again. "I promise, you won't regret this." he breathed into my ear, a hint of seduction in his voice. Lets hope not, I thought watching him sit back up onto his knees. Unwrapping the condom, he slid it over his hard dick, never taking his eyes off of me. I let out a breathe, shakily, taking in my surroundings and hoping this wouldn't be another night where I woke up regretting everything that had happened. Making sure the condom was covering his length, he leaned over barely brushing his lips across mine, in an attempt to tease me. I smiled, pressing my lips against his in one swift movement and grabbing a hand full of his hair tugging on it gently. He moaned into my mouth, his heart rate swiftly rising. Hearing him moan like that, a slight whimper following it, begging me without words to tease him a little further turned me on. Continuing to kiss me he moved his arms to either side of my body, resting his weight evenly on his elbows. I pushed my hips upward into his, telling him silently to get the show on the road. He took the hint and after a few more seconds of kissing me he slide into me, pulling his face up to meet my eyes. I brushed my lips across his cheek, waiting for the moment when he would be completely inside of me. He thrust forward again, looking my face over as he did so. I arched my back, closing my eyes to enjoy the pleasure a little more. Seconds slipped by, turning into minutes where I was in complete ecstasy. Jordan continued his kisses, first just on my lips, then he moved to my neck.

"Oh, Jordan," I moaned into his ear. His pace picked up, his breathing getting faster and heavy by the second.

"It's Taylor. Call me Taylor okay." he said, continuing to rock back and forth inside of me. I was confused at first, but I figured 'hey, if he wants to be called something else in bed. then whatever' and just went with it. So the next time I moaned his name, I said Taylor. Only this time, he corrected me again.

"No. Call me Jordan again. It turns me on more, okay." he said, his voice low and husky and his breathe hot against my neck. He held himself up a bit, continuing with the rocking motion, and looked me directly in the eyes.

"God, you're so beautiful," he said, leaning forward to kiss me again. I smiled against his lips, dragging my fingers across his back. "hmm" he let out, quickening his pace again. I dug my fingers further into his skin, arching my back slightly as he continued. I bit my lips together to keep in any and every scream that was threatening to escape from me at that moment., and Jordan could tell. "I wanna hear you scream my name, okay." He said, more of a statement than a question. My back arched further, Jordan continuing to rock faster and faster, as I let out his name in one loud moan. He finished a few minutes after I did, sweat dripping from his face. He lay his head on my chest, trying the best he could to catch his breath.

"Wow." I let out, before I even realized I had said anything. Jordan looked up at me and smiled, his hair soaked and matted to his face.

"I know." He replied, lying his head back down and kissing the area right above the middle of my breasts. He ran his finger over the mole that had been there all my life, smiling as he did so. I closed my eyes, wanting the moment to last as long as possible. "You know, I'll be in town for a while," he said again, looking back up at me once more. I opened my eyes, smiling at the thought of seeing him again, and ran my hand through the back of his tangled wet hair. "So...don't leave tonight okay?" He said to me, blue eyes shining. I nodded, my smile spreading from ear to ear.

"Okay," I answered quietly. "But tell me one thing, first."

"Yea?" he answered, waiting for me to continue.

"Why did you want me to call you Taylor?" I asked, confusion in my voice.

"You really have no idea do you?" he said, his head still lying on my chest. I shook my head no, wondering what it was he really meant "...it's better if you just know its my middle name."

"okay..." I trailed off, as he moved up and kissed me again.

"So, are you staying?" He asked, looking my face over. I nodded, smiling up at him. "Good."

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comments? ::bites nails out of nervousness::

chapter 12. pt. 2

2005-11-26T07:34:20Z

so this is the rest to chapter 12. and i'm really really sorry it took this long to get up. originally, i wrote it two days after i put twelve up, but i stashed it somewhere and sort of forgot where. teehehee. i hope you like it. and more importantly i hope you continue to read. i will, and i promise, update more. i've just had a lot going on. but now, i'm ready to write more. to create more. to let you see, and to see myself, where this story goes. but also i'd like to know, after you read this chapter, where would you like to see this story go? i think i know where i want to take it, as i was thinking about it nearly all day. but i'd still like to know what you guys think! and hey, tell people about the story (sorry. shameless self promotion there)anyways...sorry I cut Taylor's point of view off in the middle of this chapter. I'm new at...what this chapter holds so it'll take me a while to find a middle point ya know. also... i swear i will get a chapter in here with melodie's point of view again soon. (yes thats a hanson soon. sorry lol. maybe in a chapter or two)

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*taylors point of view*

I stood in the doorway of the kitchen, watching Rozelyn put the dishes away. "Roz, sweetie", I said, walking up and putting my arms around her. "he was only kidding. You know he really does like you." She sighed, shrugging me off.
"Right," she stated, turning to look up at me. "He's got a great way of showing it, too." she said, pushing past me into the living room.
"where are you going?" I questioned, watching her pick up the laptop from the desk and head towards our bedroom door. She said nothing, silence filling the room overcoming the noise of the television.
"Thanks, Zac." I snarled at him as I followed behind her.
"pft. don't blame me here, I'm not the one with constant PMS." he laughed, flipping the t.v. station. I rolled my eyes, rounding the corner into our room. Roz sat on the floor infront of the bed, tears streaming down her cheeks. Endless seas of hurt and misunderstanding.

"Baby," I said, pulling her up and onto the bed next to me. "sweetie, don't cry please." I said as I wrapped my arms around her, kissing her forehead. She heaved another sigh, pulling away only long enough to wipe her tears off of her cheeks. "I love you, that's all that will ever matter okay?" I said, leaning forward to kiss her.
"I love you, too." She whispered, moving closer to me. I smiled against her lips, pulling her into a laying position with me. "mmm" she moaned, as I moved my kisses to her neck.
"You like that?" I breathed, bunching the bottom of her shirt up in my left hand. She responded by pulling my face back to hers, kissing my lips roughly. I moved half on top of her, one hand finding its way up and under her shirt. The other hand was tangled in her hair, gently pulling it here and there.

*Zac's point of view*

"Geez man, they've been in there forever," Andrew stated, tossing the remote in the air and catching it.

"No shit. I swear, if I hear her moan one more friggin time I'll personally go in there and shut them both up." I said leaning back against the couch and closing my eyes.

"Maybe they'll be finished so--" Andrew started, only to be cut off by yet another one of Rozelyn's moans.
"ohwhatthefuck." I growled, my voice low. Now, normally I'd be happy for my brother for getting some. Especially from the queen of bitches herself, Rozelyn. But this time, it was just getting annoying. I got up from the couch and walked down the hall towards their bedroom door.

"Listen," I yelled as I approached it. "I came here to see you and hang out. Not listen to you fuck all night. So lets just hurry it on along mmkay." I stated, turning to find my way back to the living room after speaking my peace.
"You know," Andrew said quietly. "If she weren't so mean, this would be kind of a turn on. You know, assuming you weren't here in the room with me." he continued, eyeing me.

"Yea. Right." I snorted, rolling my eyes and hoping for the best that they were done. I grabbed the remote from Andrew, deciding to channel surf to see what channels they had. Click. Click. Click. They officially had the most annoying remote in the world. Channel after channel flickered by. Vibrant colors and random noises making their way out of the t.v. I stopped on a few channels, The PlayBoy Channel, some GayPorn channel, and MTV2. A few minutes later I heard their bedroom door open and close. Taylor walked into the living room, trying unsuccessfully to pull a t-shirt over his head.
"Thanks man, right in the middle of the best sex I've had all month and you gotta go and interrupt like that" he said, going into the kitchen and opening the fridge.

"Yea, well I wouldn't have had to if Roz hadn't been so damn loud." I said, following him into the kitchen.

"pft. Man, that just means I'm doing my job." He said, tossing me a can of coke. I nodded my thanks, pulling a chair out at the table. "And besides, we haven't really been getting along lately, so we sort of needed this ya know."
"Sure." I said, rolling my eyes. He was so whipped sometimes, it disgusted me.

*Taylors point of view*

I sat across from Zac at the kitchen table, both of us with nearly full cans of Coke. "So..." I said trailing off.
"So..." he repeated, in sort of a mocking tone. "I really like your apartment."
"Thanks man, its pretty sweet here. We've got the whole floor to ourselves ya know, so no one really bothers us or anything."
"That's cool, I'm thinking of moving up here sometime next month. I know Ike said something about wanting to come visit you too. Maybe he'll like it enough to move up here as well."
"Maybe, I suppose that'd be pretty cool." I said, taking a sip of the coke. I heard the door to our room open and shut, meaning Rozelyn was probably dressed by now.

chapter 12

2005-09-29T09:16:28Z

so...this too is a new chapter. its in taylors point of view. for the first time. possibly the only time. i'm not sure. anyways. i realized, after reading about five fanfics in the past week (strange) that no one really writes in certain peoples point of views or whatever. catapult does but it doesn't go back and forth much. i'm not sure if thats good or not. what do you think? i can write it like a regular story but for some reason i like the way it is where it goes back and forth. that way you get a feel for each character. you get to know what they're thinking or whatever as they do the actions they do. but that may just be me. am i rambling? sorry if i am. its just i've had this weird ass writers block for a while now, as i'm sure some of you may have noticed, and right now i'm ready to write. i'm ready to create. i credit this to a full two days of listening to nothing but jacks mannequin & something corporate. they inspire me. they release my creativity. or my writers block. or i can just shut up now. sorry. hope you enjoy!
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*taylors point of view*
I smiled into the camera, putting my arms around the girls shoulder. "Okay, ladies, this is the last picture for real. Alright!" I exclaimed, blinking as the flash nearly blinded me. I pulled away from the girls that had gathered around me, walking slowly towards Rozelyn. I smiled at her, looking down into her eyes. She gave a stiff smile, rolling her eyes at the girls who were still begging for my attention.

"You ready to find Zac and get out of here?" I whispered into her ear, hoping none of the fans still standing behind me would hear. She nodded, turning on her heel to head off towards the gate that Zac was supposed to exit out of. I followed her, my strides growing longer until I had caught up and was by her side.
"Slow. Done." I said, grabbing her hand and smiling at her. She looked at me, sleep still written all over her face. Minutes later we were standing near Zac's exist.
I hope the fans are still there when we leave, I thought to myself.What better way to get a little attention from Roz, then by making her jealous of all of the girls trying to get me to talk to them. I smiled to myself, knowing the exact look she'd give me, and also that this would be my chance to bribe her into staying away from that damn computer for at least one night.
"Hey." I heard, as I snapped back from my thoughts. "You two waiting on me or what?" Zac said, holding his arms out. Bag in one hand and his leather coat hanging over the other arm, his friend Andrew walking up behind him.
"Zac, my man." I said, pulling him into a hug as he mumbled a hello to Rozelyn. "How are ya man?" I questioned pulling away and saying hey to Andrew.
"Oh man, lets get out of here first. That was one rough flight." He said, as we turned to leave the airport.

Minutes later we were in my Range Rover, pulling out of the airports parking garage. Rozelyn sat next to me, staring out the window with a sad look on her face. Zac and Andrew sat in the back talking over each other to tell me about their "rough" flight into New York. I smiled, rolling my eyes at how childish they could be sometimes.
"So, anyways, like I was saying the stewartist kept asking me if I wanted another glass of soda right? Which I mean we all know of course transfers into her wanting me like woah, so I told her, I was like listen baby I know I'm hot and all and its hard for you to resist me but I'm taken for the time being." That was Zac.
I was so baffled, where the hell did this kid get his ego? Sometimes the things that came out of his mouth just killed me. I died laughing after his last statement, nearly going off of the road before Rozelyn grabbed the wheel and turned it back away from the side.
"God Taylor. Watch the fucking road." she said, giving me a dirty look. This made Zac burst out in laughter, Andrew soon joined in as well.
"Aw you guys are no fun." I said, adverting my attention back to the road. I switched the cd player on, hoping the cd that had been in it since our last outing in the Range Rover would make Rozelyn at least smile a bit.
"I've confessions" Roz sang softly along with the Something Corporate song, the smile I knew would appear had slowly spread across her face. If there was one thing that could get to her, it was that McMahon kid. I looked in the rearview mirror, watching Zac give me some sort of screwed up face. Probably wondering what I was listening to. I just gestured towards Roz and rolled my eyes as she continued to look out the window while singing the song.
"Holding onto what is right. The truth escaped me twice last night. In clouds of smoke and scattered ash." She sang quietly, finally turning to look at me. I smiled, putting my hand on her thigh. I love you, she mouthed. I smiled, almost shocked at how sweet she could seem sometimes.

Nearly an hour later we finally pulled into the parking garage of our apartment building, piling out of the Range Rover. Roz walked ahead of us, probably glad to be out of the vehicle. She walked quickly towards the elevator, never looking back once to see if we were behind her.
"So," Andrew started, nodding towards Rozelyn. "Whats wrong with her? She's said all of...oh nothing since we got into the car." He stated, staring at the back of her.
"She's just tired," I told him, as we got closer and closer to the elevator.
"You mean she just hates you, and is a mega bitch." Zac said, in a not so quiet voice.
"I heard that Zachary." She said, turning to face us as we reached the elevator where she stood. Zac's eyes grew large, either in shock that she'd heard him, that she'd spoken or just in fear of what she'd do. She glared at him, the death look as I liked to refer to it as, not blinking once. He figgeted with the hem of his tshirt, mumbling something of an apology. Andrew stifled a laugh as Zac, still playing with the bottom of his shirt, continued to say something that was really of know meaning to Rozelyn. He'd succesfully managed to top her shit list. This will be one great week, I thought hoping that she'd just let his last remark slide and not let it ruin the whole visit he was there.

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there is more coming but for now its late and i'm tired. so look forward to more in the evening today (thursday) and feel free to comment on whats here so far. *hopes you like at least some of it*

chapter 11

2005-09-06T06:57:33Z

just so you know, this is a new chapter. fresh. from scratch. no rewrites. just this. *sigh* tell me what you think puhlease! (remember i love the comments )

*Rozelyn's point of view*

I looked over at the clock on the night stand, staring right back at me was the red lsd reading. I sighed, eight o'clock in the morning. Who gets up this early? I thought to myself as I made the attempt to sit up out of bed, thats when I heard Taylor in the bathroom across the hall. Of course he'd be up at eight in the a.m. I rolled my eyes, about to ly back down as Taylor strutted into our bedroom, smiling at me with his freshly brushed teeth. Well at least he got rid of the stank breath before saying good morning, I thought to myself.
"Hey Rozzie Roz Roz," he said in a sing song voice as he walked to the closet. "How are you this fine morning?" he questioned, looking over at me briefly before returning back to his wardrobe.
"Don't call me that." I demanded, gritting my teeth together. He smirked, continuing to go through his clothes.
"So, are you riding with me to the airport or what?" he asked, sounding muffled as he had stepped completely into the closet. Ah, yes, Zachary was arriving this afternoon. Well at least there'd be someone else for Taylor to hang out with, perhaps that way I could get some reading done.
"Why? the plane won't be in until a little after one, its only eight right now." I said to him, pulling the pillow over my head in an attempt to hide from him.
"Yea I know," he said, walking out of the closet. "But he called me about ten minutes ago to tell me that he had caught an earlier flight. So he'll be in a little after ten."
I sighed, seriously who was up at this hour? Not me, usually, thats for sure. "Fine." I stated, getting out of the bed and walking into the bathroom.

*Melodie's point of view*

I woke up on the couch in Sean's apartment to the smell of coffee. I looked around my surroundings, temporarily forgetting why I was there. Taylorness how could I forget that! A small smile crept over my face, as I sat up. Sean was standing next to the window on the opposite side of the living room.
"Hey," I said to him, my voice sounding hoarse. He jumped, grabbing his chest and turning to look at me.
"Geez, Mel, next time make some sort of noise so I know you're awake."
" I did. I said 'hey'." I remarked, smirking. "So, when are we going to see Taylorness?" I asked, hoping that he had maybe called him to meet up again.
"I'm not sure, to tell the truth. I know his brother was supposed to come visit sometime. I'm sure he'll be fairly busy and I mean what reson do I have to see him again? The interview's done Mel." Five minutes awake and he was already irritating me. us.
"Well just tell him that you had a few more questions for him or something. Geez." I said to him, standing and walking towards the kitchen to poor myself a cup of coffee. We don't like coffee.

*Rozelyn's point of view*

9:28. I still had yet to figure why I was really up that early, but none the less I'd forced myself to take a shower and get dressed. Before I even had time to eat something Taylor had drug me out to the Range Rover, mumbling something about being late. Just what I need, I thought to myself, stuck in a car with Taylor and on an empty stomach no less. I sighed, staring at the window as the buildings passed by slowly.
"What's wrong baby," Taylor said, patting my knee as he came to a stop at a red light. I looked at him, sleep still threatening to take over me as I had yet to fully wake up; even after I had showered I was tired. He smiled, pleading me silently to tell him what all of my sighs were for.
"Nothing," I said, forcing a small tight smile.
"Don't give me that hon. Seriously, whats wrong?" he questioned again, this time a little firmer.
"I'm just tired Jordan, geez." I said, sounding irritated. He bit his lower lip, slowly turning back to face the road. It was a few minutes before either of us broke the silence that had followed my sudden pissy-ness. And when it was broken, it was Taylor who had said something, or more rather sung it.
"don't go telling me lies tonight" he sang quietly, keeping his eyes on the road. "cause you're" he paused, looking over at me momentarily. "cause you're crazy beautiful" he sang, returning his attention to his driving. Wow, when Taylor laid it on, he laid it on thick. I thought, unable to contain the small smile that had found its way to my face.
"Ugh," I sighed, intentionally this time, to get his attention. When I noticed the interested look on his face that told me he was listening I continued, "I'm just not sure about Zachary staying with us." I said to him, running my hands over the armrest on my seat.
"Sweetheart," Taylor breathed in a very sexy and very masculine sounding voice, "it will be fine. And besides, stop calling him Zachary. It's Zac to you, even he said." he reached across the space that divided us in the vehicle, grabbing my hand.
"I...I know Tay, it's just." I stopped, unsure if I should go on. It was clear to me that Taylor longed for his family to like me, to get along with me, to accept me. But, sometimes we all can't have what we want. I had felt nothing but bad vibes from both of his brothers since the day I had met them. Taylor swore it was just because they didn't know me well enough, and at first I just thought it was me. But the more I thought about it, the more I figured it was just because I wasn't the normal blonde model that those two seemed to be attracted to. We stopped at another red light, Taylor looking over at me. Waiting for me to continue. "It's just...uhhh, I don't know. I'm just tired. I don't feel like dealing with him being rude to me right now." I stated, turning back to look out the window. After that Taylor didn't say much, probably because three minutes later we had pulled into the JFK Airport's parking lot. We hadn't even gotten inside the lobby yet before people had noticed Taylor. For forty five minutes, I stood on the side waiting as Taylor signed autograph after autograph and posed for numerous pictures. I scoffed, turning to sit down in one of the chairs only a few feet behind me. Sometimes, I didn't know how he put up with all of the attention. But then I remembered just how much attention he required, and figured it was for the best that he was noticed so much.

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okay. that may or may not be the ending of 11. I'm not sure but its late. Anyways, I'll just stop there. No need to make this longer when its already 3a.m. (hehe tracy) tell me what you think. am i getting too soft with rozelyn's character? or is it okay?

chapter 10

2005-08-30T07:59:04Z

rewrite per usual.
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*chapter 10*
*melodie’s point of view*

I found myself stepping off of the train I had taken into New York, only a short 24 hours after I had spoken to Sean. My mind was spinning, there were so many things to do to get to Taylorness. I looked around, searching for Sean, who had promised to meet me at the train station that evening. I stood there, like a lost puppy, for nearly ten minutes before I finally spotted him walking towards me through the crowd. I smiled, rushing towards him. My heart was beating so fast, I had to get on it if I wanted to meet Taylorness within the next few hours. I was hoping that Sean would take me directly to him, but I could tell from the look in his eyes that he’d want to catch up first. Ugh, I sighed. Why did he have to be so obnoxious? Why did we, you, go out with someone like him?
“Hey!” he exclaimed, throwing his arms up in the air for a hug. I hugged him quickly, and then pulled him out towards the front of the station. We stepped through the doors in the front lobby area into the chilly air once again. Sean stuck his arm in the air and hailed for a cab to stop for us. As soon as one did, we hopped in and were on our way to Sean’s apartment.

*Rozelyn’s point of view*

Augh, I yawned, stretching my arms into the air. I hadn’t slept to great the night before, I never did when Taylor wasn’t in the bed, but there was no way I was giving in. I was right this time, he was over reacting and had gone into full on drama queen mode the night before. I was so tired that I passed on even getting on the computer and decided instead to lay on the couch with a good book, but by four o’clock that afternoon I was finished with the book and had moved onto bogarding the t.v. remote. I had found a movie on Lifetime about some girl and how she had gotten pregnant when she was 16. Taylor was in the workout room, per usual, working off all of his anger. Better him work it off in there then on me, I thought to myself. We hadn’t said more then three words to each other all day, which was strange for Taylor because he could talk for hours on end, even if he was upset with me.

I sighed, getting off the couch and heading for the kitchen for a drink. I was growing bored from the movie, and starting to feel a bit hungry. I wonder if Tay’s hungry, I thought to myself as I scanned the refrigerator for a drink. Even if we were mad at each other, we both still had to eat. I stood there, contemplating whether to just apologize to him; whether I meant it or not. In the end I gave up and made my way to the workout room, finding Taylor in his normal spot; the weight bench. What was with him and “pumping iron” when he was mad? Hell what was with every guy doing that when they were pissed? I rolled my eyes, sighing. His eyes darted towards me, distress still written all over his face. He set the bar with the weights on each end down and sat up.
“ Hey,” I said quietly, slowly walking towards him. He nodded looking down towards the floor. I had a sudden urge to just turn around and walk out of the room, and NOT apologize. But, the truth was, that I was tired of all of our fighting. It seemed to be the only thing that we did now a days and I just couldn’t stand it any longer. (even if I did think I was right, he whined far too much) “So, when is Zac’s plane getting here?” I questioned him, making small talk before I could get up enough nerve to apologize to him.
“Sometime tomorrow afternoon,” He replied, seeming surprised that I had moved from my position on the couch. "He said something about coming early because he didn't want to spend another second listening to Isaac complain about not having a girlfriend."
“Oh,” I nodded, looking at my bare feet. “So, um…” I started. This was it, it’s now or never, go time. “I’m, um, I’m…” I stuttered, walking closer towards where he remained on the bench. He stared up at me, no further then an inch away.
“yea?” he asked eagerly. I looked up towards the ceiling, god give me strength enough to do this. I had never been one to apologize, but this time I supposed it was necessary. Staring back down at him, I slowly placed both of my hands on his shoulders. He just sat there, staring. Why was I suddenly beginning to feel nervous? Damn it Taylor, why do your eyes always have to get me?
I straddled his lap, looking him directly in the eyes, “listen, I’m really sorry about last night. I know we don’t spend enough time together, and I also know that you have never nor would you ever cheat on me. I just guess its hard to adjust to having you back in every day life. I mean one day you’re gone the next you’re here, and its just crazy sometimes, you know.” I was rambling. “ I really am sorry Taylor, really I am.” I stared at him, and his eyes seemed to soften a bit. Good, my apology was working. “So, do you except my apology?” I questioned him, finally taking a breath from everything I had said. He nodded, pulling me closer to him and kissing my lips roughly. I kissed him back and then pulled away, still feeling hungry. “you wanna get some food?” I asked.
“No!” he smiled, kissing me again. I pulled back, resisting the urge to kiss his tender lips. “not just yet,” he said, answering my question before I even asked it. Before I knew he was kissing me again, one hand slowly making its way up the back of my ‘gettin lucky in Kentucky’ t-shirt. It was clear what was on his mind, and I sighed. Sex or food? I thought over and over again. It really is bad when you’re seriously considering going out to eat rather then making love to your boyfriend. Before I could think another thought though, he had pulled my shirt over my head and was slowly pulling me down on top of him. Looks like I’m not getting my food, I thought to myself. We continued to make out lying on the weight bench, for about ten minutes until he made the wrong move to the right, sending me to the floor with a crash.
“ugh,” I said grabbing my knee. I had hit it on the floor, the thud echoing through the apartment like a loud clap of thunder. “Damnit Taylor” I screeched at him, standing up and grabbing my shirt.

*melodies point of view*

We had been sitting in Sean’s living room, waiting on a pizza to be delivered, for what seemed like two hours. In reality, pft what did we know about reality, it was only like twenty minutes. But it was still a long time. My stomach grumbled, as Sean continued to talk about the interview he had done with Taylorness. Everything was fine until he had to go and mention how “pretty” Rozelyn is. I rolled my eyes, trying my best to ignore that last comment. My efforts were cut short though, as he decided to continue on about her looks. I faked a gag, and rolled my eyes again. Maybe HE should be with the stupid bitch instead of our, your Taylorness. Before he could go on any further the doorbell rang. I jumped up from the couch, hoping it was the pizza delivery guy. Thank god it was or I, we, would’ve gone crazy.

I paid the guy with a twenty, telling him to keep the change (it was Sean's so what did I care?) and shut the door without a second thought. An hour and a half in this city and I was already acting just as rude as the next person. I set the pizza on the coffee table, ignoring Sean's scream about how the grease would go through the box and ruin the wood finish. Such a whiner. Within five minutes I was already on my second piece of pizza, while listening to Sean who was still rambling about Rozelyn.
“Seriously, Mel, you should see her. And she’s really nice too!” he exclaimed, his hands flailing around in the air as he talked. I rolled my eyes at him, for what seemed like the hundredth time. I sighed, trying to give him a not so subtle hint that I had had enough of hearing about Rozelyn.
“So…” I started, staring at the carpet. “How’d Taylor look?” I questioned, my eyes still downcast.
“Oh, he looked the same as he usually does. I mean its hard to tell if he’s changed his looks or anything since I see him around town a lot.” My eyes widened at his last few words. He saw him around town? I mean that makes perfectly good sense seeing as how he lives in New York, I guess maybe I just didn’t expect him to be out and about all the time. Before I could say anything, Sean had begun again. “He should really stop smoking though, I mean I think that’s the only bad thing about Rozelyn, she isn’t making him quit smoking. His voice, well lets just say I’ve heard him sound better.” he said. I was a little upset. No one was going to talk about my, our, Taylorness that way!

*Rozelyn’s point of view*

Taylor walked into the bathroom, where I had settled on the edge of the tub trying to bandage up a huge gapping cut on my knee from where I was sent flying earlier in the weight room. I cursed Taylor and everything else under my breath while trying to rub peroxide over the cut.
“That looks painful.” Taylor stated, in a know-it-all voice.
“Duh.” I retorted rolling my eyes and continuing the vicious cycle of swab, wince, and continue until I felt the wound was clean enough to put a band aid on it; assuming we had one big enough of course. Taylor folded his arms over his chest, giving me the impression he was about to go into another drama filled fit over nothing at all. I silently pleaded with god for just a few minutes of peace, and apparently that had worked. He just stood there, staring, with those blue seas of never-ending emotion that were his eyes.
“you know, I didn’t mean to, you know, hurt you or anything.” he said, hesitant at first. I nodded, turning and looking into his eyes. He seemed to know just the way to look at me sometimes, other times I had found myself wishing he wouldn't look at me at all, but today it somehow made me feel special. I gave him a small smile, knowing he hadn't meant to hurt me earlier. He raised one eyebrow a smirk dancing on his lips, "So you're smiling at me again huh?" he questioned, still staring at me. I gave him another nod, continuing to finish up the last bit of bandaging.
"yea," I said coolly. "I figured why not you know, I mean you do pay my rent and all." I said, in a joking manner. I had a feeling he wouldn't catch on though and would only lash out on me, again. Surprisingly, he didn't.
"Ha. Funny. You've become quite the comedian in my absence Rozzie." he said, using one of the many pet names he had for me. I gave him another smile, this time it spread from ear to ear. I swear, I think I'm suffering from shock because of the blood loss or something. I mean how else do you describe the sudden all around niceness towards Taylor? I couldn't. Simple as that. I stared at him for a few more seconds, our eyes locking, capturing each others gaze and holding it for what seemed like a whole eternity. My heart did a flip flop, or at least it felt that way, and I couldn't help but move a little closer to him and place a small kiss on his lips. With that I turned and walked towards the living room, Taylor close behind. I had every intention of still getting the food I wanted so I stopped abruptly turning to face Taylor. Too bad my reflexes weren't a little faster, perhaps I could've made it out of his way before he slammed into me sending me yet again to the ground. Ugh, I let out, looking up at Tay from the floor. His lips were pressed together tightly, a small smile threatening to take over his face at any second.
"Don't. Laugh." I demanded of him just as he let out the beginning of a giggle. yes. A giggle. He pressed his lips together again, his face reddening from the amount of self restraint he was using to not burst out with laughter. I narrowed my eyes, waiting for him to just get it out of his system. "It's really not funny." I continued as his mouth opened and all of the laughter he had so unsuccessfully tried to hold back came flooding out. I couldn't help but crack a small smile, the man giggles. Who wouldn't smile at that?

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note from the author: the name rozzie is not pronounced rosie. *shakes head* nope. its pronounced r-ah-zzee

chapter 8 & chapter 9

2005-08-23T07:28:26Z

rewrite...most definitely
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chapter 8
*melodie’s point of view*

Since I had previously hung up on Rozelyn, without saying a word, I figured that I’d wait until tomorrow to call back. What if Taylorness answered the phone and I couldn’t say anything? They’d change their number for sure. I sat down at the kitchen table and opened a can of Dr. Pepper. I hated the stuff, but if the Hanson’s could drink then I could too. Be exactly like him. I took a sip of the soda, and returned the can to the table once again. I had to figure out what I was going to say to Rozelyn when I called her again, assuming they hadn't already gotten their number changed.

*Rozelyn’s point of view*

“Hi!” Taylor smiled warmly, moving aside so Sean could step into our apartment. “This is my girlfriend, Rozelyn.” he said, pointing to me like some sort of trophy. I smiled shyly, waving my hand. A few seconds later we were all sitting in the living room, Taylor offering to make a pot of coffee. I volunteered to make the coffee, telling Taylor to go ahead with his interview. Walking into the kitchen I listened to everything that Sean and Taylor were talking about. Sean was saying something about how he would just record everything so that way Taylor was quoted better. I finished making the coffee, and walked back to the couch where Taylor had already begun to answer questions. Two hours and a three pots of coffee later, the interview was complete, and I had barely said a word. Taylor and I both walked Sean to the door to let him out.
“Thanks Taylor, I appreciate it man.” Sean said as he opened the door.
“Not a problem.” Taylor replied, wrapping his arm around my waist.
“She sure is quiet,” Sean said back, staring at me. Taylor nodded, then waved and Sean stepped out into the hall, shutting the door behind him.
Taylor walked back the couch as I sat down at the computer desk. “Let me guess, another night in front of the computer screen, reading that fucking fanfic?” he questioned, staring at the floor. I sighed, and turned the computer on. He’d have to get over it sooner or later, I thought, so why bother arguing with him. I got onto the internet searching for the page I was looking for. Soon I had found myself completely absorbed into the story once more, and two hours had flown by. I looked up from the computer screen, blinking my eyes a few times. Taylor wasn’t in the room, so I figured he had gone to workout again. Getting up from the computer desk I walked down the hall. I peered into the room, no one there. Hmm, I sighed, wondering where he had gone and when. I hadn’t heard him even get off the couch. I rolled my eyes as I opened the door to our bedroom; completely empty. Shaking my head I walked back through the apartment to the kitchen, no Taylor in there either. There was a note on the counter, saying that he had gone for a walk and he’d be home soon. There wasn’t a time on it though, and I was beginning to question if it was even from the same night. I may not pay a lot of attention to him, but when he goes out alone I worry. Who knows what kind of crazy fans are lurking around our apartment building.
I grabbed my coat and walked out into the hall, locking the door behind me. I stepped into the elevator, and pressed the ground floor button. Once the elevator doors opened again, I was greeted by a dimly lit hallway. I started towards the parking garage, peering slowly around the entrance way. Our Range Rover was parked along the far wall like usual. So he had walked to where ever he was, I though, growing even more angry that I hadn’t heard him leave. Making my way out to the sidewalk, I looked down the street both ways. No one there, for once the streets of Manhattan were virtually deserted. I pulled my coat together and buttoned it up, deciding to walk down towards the park on the east side of the neighborhood. I walked for what seemed like ten minutes before I got to the entrance of the park. It was growing colder out by the second it seemed, and I was beginning to wish I hadn’t even worried about where Taylor had gone. I moved through the park hoping that I found him soon. Towards the end of the park, I saw someone sitting on a bench. They hadn’t noticed me yet so I strolled slowly towards them, praying it was him. The person on the bench moved there head, looking in a different direction. I caught a glimpse of long blonde hair, and got excited, it had to be Taylor.
Approaching the person, I saw that it was him sitting there. “Hey,” I said to him, sitting down on the bench. He looked at me, a frown on his face.

*Melodie’s point of view*
I had tried to call Rozelyn back a few times, but she never picked up. I had given up on the idea for the time being, and was trying to come up with a different plan to get to her. I wondered if my ex boyfriend Sean had seen Taylor walking around at all, I mean he did live in New York as well. I smiled to myself, and figured it couldn’t hurt to call him.

definitely a double chapter post

rewrite---enjoy

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*chapter 9*
*melodie’s point of view*

I had called Sean to talk to him, mainly about Taylorness but about other things too. He and I talked for quite some time about things. He told me about the interview he had just done with Taylorness and that bitch Rozelyn. So he had seen him! I was so excited when he told me he had just done this interview, I nearly squealed with joy. I made him promise that he would let me come stay with him for a few days, this way I’d have a better chance in meeting Taylorness. And getting Rozelyn out of the picture.

*Rozelyn’s point of view*
Taylor sat there staring at me for what seemed like hours. In reality it was only a few seconds, but time always seems to stop when he’s locked those blue eyes on you. I felt myself suddenly melting into a pile of nothing. In a way I felt horrible for the fact that I hadn’t even heard him leave, and for the fact that I had truly paid no attention to him lately.
“Hey,” he said to me finally, looking up into the night sky.
“Sort of cold out, don’t you think?” I questioned, expecting him to completely explode on me at any moment. He shrugged, still looking at the stars above us, the wonder and amazement that usually filled them with such magnificent sparkle had suddenly been replaced with an iced over hurt that never failed to let me know he was hurt.
“Maybe,” he replied. “So, how long did you sit there before you realized I left?” there was hurt in his voice as well. He turned his head and stared me in the eyes, waiting for my reply.
I shrugged, “I’m not sure. When did you leave?” I questioned, turning my eyes towards the ground.
“Don’t worry,” he said, shaking his head. I sighed, at that point in time I didn’t think there was anything that he could say that would make me feel shittier then I already did. How could I just completely not notice my boyfriend? I was horrible.
“Taylor, listen I’m sorry. But you’ve got to understand, when you come home from tour you act like you’re everything. I mean sure I miss you when you’re gone, I really do and I long for you to be home with me. But then you just walk in with that attitude that you get whenever you go out on tour.” I said, my voice quiet, apologetic in a way, but firm as well.
“What attitude?” he questioned, seeming oblivious to the way he acted when he got in from tour.
“You know what attitude. You walk in with that look on your face like just because you’re Taylor fucking Hanson that I should bow down to you. And I’m not treating you like that. I love you Taylor, nothing compares to the way I love you but you have to understand, when you’re gone for months on end getting tons of attention from all of your fans and then you come home you expect me to do the same. I’m not going to throw myself at you every time you’re around. You might be a star to everyone else, but you’re just Jordan Taylor to me.”
“Just Jordan Taylor huh? Then what the hell is your obsession with these damn stories about me?”He said, finally looking at me through the darkness that was surrounding the park.
“Have you read any of them? It’s all wishful thinking and it cracks me up. I need something to pass my time when I’m not working and you’re not home.”
“Exactly,” he said looking away from me again. “When I’m not home.” he said over exaggerating the not. Taylor could be such a drama queen in his moments of feeling neglected. “But I’m home now and that still hasn’t stopped you.” I sat there, staring at him, with that pissed off look in his eyes. I could tell I had hurt him, but like I said he’s such a drama queen sometimes. I had my moments sure, but he’s a guy for god sakes. I felt the need to just get up and walk away from him, give him time to realize how irrationally he was acting. But then I started thinking, what if I was the one acting irrationally? I shook the thought out of my head before I could let it grow into something bigger.
“Taylor, I honestly don’t know what to say to you. You knew how I was when we got together and that never stopped you until now.”
“That’s because now I’m ready to get really serious about our relationship.”
“So you weren’t serious about us before? Nice Taylor, really nice.” I said, standing up and moving away from him. He sat there staring up at me, and suddenly I didn’t see the Taylor I had seen before. Him saying that he was ready to get serious, just made me think that up until now he hadn’t been. What if he had cheated on me with those stupid teeny fans of his? They would do anything for him, so what was stopping him from doing the deed with them? Insecurities were running through my mind, and the look on his face said he could tell that. I had the sudden urge to just run as far away from him as I could, but I figured that there would be no use in that.
“No, I didn’t mean it that way Rozelyn. And you know that. I love you so much. I just meant that-”
“That you weren’t serious about us until now. It’s ok, I get it Taylor. Why tie yourself down when you can have any tramp in the world.” I said, my voice rising with anger. He stared at me once again, his blue eyes seemed to ripple like oceans. I used to see forever in those eyes, I thought to myself, now I’m not seeing much of anything. “Nice.” I remarked one last time before turning to walk away.
“No, Rozelyn, wait.” he said grabbing my arm, and turning me back to face him. His eyes had begun to tear over, maybe it was the cold just bothering him, but it looked to me like he was crying. I rolled my eyes, looking at his hand still on my wrist. He removed it, biting on his lower lip. “ I’ve always been serious, I just thought maybe we could take that to the next level…” he said, trailing off. His lower lip had begun to quiver, and it was clear to me that it wasn’t the cold making his eyes water.
“Stop crying Taylor. You look like a little bitch.” I said coldly. He shut his eyes, still chewing his lower lip. I wanted to kiss him and punch him in the face at the same time, damn him for making me have such mixed feelings all the time. He never ceased to amaze me with the things he said. On tour he'd call me after a show and tell me about how exciting it was. Whisper all the right words at the right times, in exactly the right tone. But when he was home, all of that just seemed to discinegrate into nothing. The only words he could find to say to me where usually about me reading on the internet, or needing to go outside for some "natural light". And I was the same, at times. When he was gone I longed for him to be near me. For just a few minutes of silenced comfort in his arms. And then he'd come home, and all I could do was push him away and ignore him. I summed most of my actions up to him just being over dramatic and causing me to subconsciously do it. Breaking from my thoughts I turned yet again to walk away, this time instead of stopping me Taylor just followed. A few minutes later we were back at our apartment. I had made my way to our room, making sure Taylor knew clear well that he would be sleeping on the couch tonight.

chapter 7

2005-08-22T06:02:47Z

rewrite as usual! hope you enjoy!

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*chapter 7*
*Rozelyn's point of view*

"Hello!" I said, as I picked up the phone. Nothing. All I heard was breathing. God I hated it when fans found out our number and then called. They wouldn't say anything if I answered the phone. Hmmm, I sighed, "It's for you Taylor." I said loudly, already irritated.

"Who is it?" he questioned from down the hall. I shrugged to myself, knowing that he couldn't see me. As he turned the corner into the living room I heard a click from the phone. Picking it up, I stared at the screen. Whoever it was had already hung up.
“Never mind they must’ve hung up,” I said, lying the phone down on the desk. He rolled his eyes and smiled a big toothy smile in my direction.
“Yea I bet there was someone on the phone, you just wanted me to stop working out so you could have your way with me while I’m all hot and sweaty.” he said, moving his eyebrows up and down so I'd know what he meant.
“Um, no!” I declared. A hurt look came over his face and I knew that I had crushed his hopes of getting any. I rolled my eyes at him, turning back to the computer.
“God…” he trailed off, not saying anything else. He stood there for a few seconds and then turned around and stomped back down the hall. Why was he so damn needy sometimes? BRRRRRING…BBBBRRRRRRRRRING… that was the most irritating noise to hear, stupid telephone I thought.“Ugh.” I let out as I picked the phone up again.
“If this damn phone rings one more time.” I said aloud to no one in particular. “Hello?” I questioned, sounding more then a little upset. I waited for a reply.
“Um, this is Sean, the reporter that talked to Taylor yesterday.” the voice on the other end said. I waited in silence for him to go on, only half paying attention to anything he said. “Anyways, we were supposed to have some sort of get together tonight, I was wondering if that was still on.” he stated, a little too sure of himself.
“Hold on. I’ll go see.” I said beginning to walk down the hall towards the work out room. “Hey, Tay.” I said to Taylor as I came into the workout room. I didn’t wait for his reply before I continued, “Some reporter guy is on the phone and wants to know if your get together tonight is still on.” He looked up from the weights he had just sat down.
“Sean?” he questioned. I nodded holding the phone out. He shook his head no, motioning to me to take care of it. What am I his damn secretary, I thought to myself. “Just tell him yea tonight at like 8:30. Give him our address and tell him to just come here.” I shrugged, and told the reporter what Taylor had told me to tell him. A few seconds later, I hung up. I looked at Taylor, as he returned to his weight lifting. I sighed, shaking my head and walking away.

*Melodies point of view*

She had yelled for Taylorness to pick up the phone before I could gain enough courage to say her name. I wasn’t quite sure how she’d react once I told her who I was. Like we, um, you care. I slammed the phone down, grunting. I couldn’t believe when it came down to it I couldn’t even talk to her. But what if she wouldn’t meet me? What if she wouldn’t give me their address? Oh, she will. The girl has no common sense. I smiled to myself, and walked towards the kitchen.

*Rozelyn’s point of view*

I sifted through my closet looking for something to wear. Taylor had asked me to dress up a little bit, and I had agreed. He was wearing a pair of jeans with a black button up shirt. I decided on a pair of black flairs and a burgundy turtle neck. I was going to wear my hair down, yet another request from Taylor. I giggled a little as I pulled the clothes from my closet, I'm not sure why but I always felt really special when Taylor asked me to wear my hair a certain way or wear a certain pair of pants. It meant that he liked it that way and that he'd end up staring at me all night. I changed quickly, hoping that I would have enough time to pick up the living room and kitchen a little bit.
After I had put the finishing touches on my makeup I walked out to the living room where Taylor was already straightening things up. “Can I help?” I questioned, giving him a smile. It was best to keep him in a good mood with the reporter coming over. He nodded, not looking up from the books he was stacking on the coffee table. I stood there for what seemed like an hour, until he looked up at me.
“Wow…” he muttered, looking me up and down. I shrugged, and smiled. He stepped in front of me, placing his hands on my hips. He leaned forward and kissed me, his lips lingering in front of mine for a moment before he pulled away. We both smiled at the same time. He sat down on the couch, patting the cushion beside him. I took the offered position on the couch, turning half way as to see his face. He smiled one of those heart melting smiles he seemed to keep locked away for special occassions, or fans. I leaned forward slowly, barely touching his lips with mine. He smiled, breathing a little heavier due to the anticipated kiss. I lingered there, teasing his lips for a few seconds before he got tired of that and just pushed his lips against mine. I giggled as he began to kiss me a little softer, turning the kiss into one of the most passionate kisses the two of us had shared in a long time. Before we could get any further the doorbell went off. You had to have a key or authorization before you could come in, so I got off the couch and walked over to hit the call button and ask who it was.
“Sean,” the voice I had heard earlier on the telephone answered. I hit the authorize button, and walked back to the couch.
“Nervous?” Taylor asked. I nodded, this was the first time I would be involved in an interview of Taylor’s. I knew that the reporter had already talked to Isaac and Zac, and they had said that he asked some pretty tough questions. Nothing like those teeny bopper magazines would ask. There was a knock on the door. “I’ll get it,” Taylor said, jumping up from the couch. I walked to the door behind him. He yanked it open to reveal a tall, skinny bald guy. He smiled at us as we smiled back at him.
“Hello!,” he said, greeting Taylor with a handshake and a smile.

chapter 6

2005-08-22T04:32:27Z

rewrite! a few places here and there.. chapter seven is up next.

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*chapter 6*
*melodie’s point of view*

I sat at the computer smiling, I had just read the last email Rozelyn had sent me. Stupid bitch, I was playing her like a quick game of monopoly! She had no clue that I was going to steal her boyfriend from her. There would be no protesting from him, he’d gladly come to you. I emailed her back, telling her that we should meet sometime, I hoped that that wouldn’t scare her off. I also told her that I couldn’t stand Taylorness, which is a bold faced lie. I explained that it was a story written about a friend, but that I had used my own name because I liked it. I figured she’d believe it, I mean she had no clue that I knew she was his girlfriend. How stupid could this bitch be? She lets him travel alone doesn’t she? She can’t be too smart. I laughed to myself, logging off of the internet. Taylorness will be yours soon my dear, don’t worry. I turned my CD player on, and laid down on my bed. STRONG ENOUGH TO BREAK started out quietly, slowly getting a little louder. I closed my eyes, singing along with the song. I don’t feel myself today… I trailed off, quietly listening to Taylorness’s voice. I listened to the whole UNDERNEATH album before I moved from the position on my bed. I had hoped by the time the album was over, Rozelyn would’ve emailed me back, but my inbox was empty. She’s probably screwing him one last time. I sighed, I couldn’t wait until Taylorness and I could be together every night. My life wouldn’t seem so boring.

*Rozelyn’s point of view*
I pushed the enter button, finally after the internet decided to freeze up on me not once but twice,I had finished paying our bills online. Taylor had been working out for more then an hour now, and I figured he’d be out soon to make sure I wasn’t reading the fanfic. I had the window hidden, incase he walked in without me noticing. I wasn’t about to sit and listen to him bitch at me for reading the story, at least not for the rest of the day. I heard the radio blasting down the hall, and figured that I would be safe to read a few more paragraphs.

I opened the window, and continued reading where I had left off. I had gotten through three additional chapters before I had realized that it was nearly dark out, and Taylor had yet to come out of the workout room. Did he pass out or something, I wondered to myself. “TAYLOR!” I screamed at the top of my lungs, a few seconds later the music stopped.
“What?” he questioned, not coming out of the room.
“Are you still working out?” I questioned, looking around the room. I waited for a few seconds, with no answer. I got up out of the chair I was in, and made the journey down the hall. Walking through the door I saw him lying on the weight bench again. Rolling my eyes, I walked towards him. “Hey,” I said playfully kicking his leg.
“What?” he questioned, trying to stay focused.
“How long are you going to workout?” I questioned.
“ I don’t know, I guess until I feel I’ve worked out enough. That or until you decide to give up that damn fanfic.” he kept pumping, his forearms straining with each rep. The veins on his arms were sticking out, I could trace them from shoulder to fingers. It was times like these that I found him incredibly sexy, at his best in my opinion. His hair was matted to his forehead in spots, sweat trickling down the side of his face. There was something about the way he looked as he flexed and unflexed his arms with each repition, it took every ounce of self control to stop myself from just jumping on him right then and there.
“ Well I guess you’re going to be working out for quite a while,” I answered,breaking away from my thoughts and turning swiftly and walking out the door and back to the living room.

*Melodie’s point of view*
I had been out for nearly three hours shopping for something for Taylorness. I figured once Rozelyn introduced us, I would give him a present to show how much I cared about him. He’d realize how much she doesn’t care for him. I had ended up buying him a Rolling Stones t-shirt, hoping he didn’t already have it. I threw the bags of things from the mall onto my bed, and practically jumped into the chair in front of my desk. I took my computer off standby and opened up my email. Waiting for me was her reply to my last email. I got so nervous when I first saw it that I nearly peed myself from squeeling so loud. I opened it quickly, reading through it. She had wrote that she wasn’t sure about meeting me but that we could keep emailing each other. Stupid bitch isn’t willing to share? Guess we’ll just have to make her share. I was pissed, but figured that I could just lie to her and say that I knew a friend of hers. She was smart enough to question it for a minute but too stupid to know it was really a lie.
I dialed the number again, waiting for someone to pick up on the other end. I hoped that Taylorness would answer, but he didn’t. Rozelyn picked up the phone, with a brief hello.
“Hello?” she questioned, I was unsure if I had dialed the right number.

chapter 5

2005-08-21T08:35:21Z

this chapter, like so many others have and will be, has been rewritten/edited. It's longer nothing taken out lol.

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*chapter 5*
*melodie’s point of view*

I sat at the computer, staring at the screen. I couldn’t figure out what to type in my email to Rozelyn, so I just sat there. “ugh.” I sighed to myself, shaking my head. I decided to just start typing, and whatever came out, well that’s what I would send. Ten minutes later, the email was finished. It read:
Rozelyn, I’m glad you liked my story… heehee, a lot of people do. That sux that your boyfriend whines a lot. Guys can be stupid! Anyways, why does he go out of town a lot? On business or something? I was just wondering… so I guess I’ll finish this up, so it won’t be too long. Email me back, I’d like to hear what you think of the rest of the story.
Melodie

I clicked on the send button, it was over. I had emailed her back, and all I had to do now was wait for her to read it. I couldn’t wait to get my plan in motion, Taylorness was days away. I could feel him in everything I did, thought and said. He feels you to Mel. I smiled to myself, hoping she wouldn’t take too long to reply. I honestly could not wait to meet this girl, I knew she would go for everything I said to her, I had planned it all out. We’d meet and she’d introduce me to Taylorness without even realizing that he’d break up with her for me. Of course he would Melodie, he loves you. I wouldn’t take no for an answer either, I had to get to Taylorness. He was like one of those fly traps you hang from the ceiling, you just fly right to him and before you know it your stuck and you can’t get loose. That’s how Taylorness was honestly, he just seemed to put everyone under a spell. Except for you Mel, what you and he have is REAL. I smiled to myself, happy with the plan I had created.

*Rozelyns point of view*

Taylor had once again returned to the gym room to workout, claiming he had eaten way too much at the Chinese restaurant. As soon as he had walked down the hall, I had returned to my normal position in front of the computer. I decided to check my email before going back to my story. There were a few from Zac, Tay’s brother of course, and one from Melodie. I read the two from Zac, they were just about him coming to visit us in a week or two and bringing a friend. I made a mental note to tell Taylor about the emails. I opened Melodie’s email, reading it slowly. I emailed her back, unable to wait to tell her what I thought of the latest chapter.

Melodie,
Yea, I bet a lot of people do. It’s so good! Ha, yea guys are stupid sometimes… but mines not. He just likes to whine every now and then! Well he goes out of town for business, kind of. I mean, I guess you could consider it business, I usually travel with him, just here lately I’ve started staying home more. Oh, man, the lastest chapter of your story is incredible! You're not really that obsessed with Taylor are you? Just wondering, cause there are so many people who are. It’s quite ridiculous! I mean no offense. Lol! I just think it’s funny how so many people are crazy about the dude. Well, um, yea, I guess I’ll go read some more! Haahaa T.V.I.M.H. seems to be the only thing I’m obsessed with lately!
- Roz…

I sighed, reading the email over before sending it. I didn’t want her to know about Taylor and I, just in case she was obsessed with him like it seemed in her story. I hit send, and closed out my email account. I stuck my brand new CD into my player and threw my headphones on. Seconds later, I was reading the rest of chapter 13. Before too long though, I found myself singing along with the record instead of reading. *We saw the western coast, I saw the hospitallll!* I screamed, bobbing my head up and down. I loved the concept of headphones. What a way to listen to music and block out everyone else at the same time! *Reports of loverrrrs tryst, were neither clear nor descript… …The QUIET things that no one ever knows!* I continued screaming, paying no attention to anything around me. Now, despite how it may sound, I can actually sing. I just don't make a habit of doing it for fear that Taylor will get some sort of whacked idea. I must have really been getting into it, because a few minutes later Taylor was at my side giving me a weird look. I hit the pause button and slide the headphones off of my ears, feeling my cheeks blush a deep red.
“What?” I questioned, pretending I had no idea I was singing so loudly.
“What the hell are you in here screaming about?” he questioned, laughing at me. He knew full well that when I had my headphones on I tended to lose myself and everything around me, which usually ended up in me screaming at the top of my lungs a song that no one else could hear but me. I smiled at him, shaking my head.
“Nothin’!” I proclaimed, moving a little in front of the screen. I knew if he saw I had once again returned to the fanfic he’d be upset, and I really didn’t want to hear him whine about it for the second time today.
“So, what are you doing? Anything new and interesting?” he peered over my head at the screen on the laptop. “Damnit Roz!” he yelled. “Why the hell can’t you stop reading that shit?” he questioned with a cross look on his face. I opened my mouth to speak, but he cut me off. “Can’t you go one fucking day without reading that shit? Man, sometimes I think you love those damn stories more then you do me.” he stopped and stared at me, waiting for a reply. I put my head down, not liking the sound of him yelling. I was not one for yelling at all, and Taylor knew that, but it seemed he used this to his advantage at times. I had made it a habit to just cave into whatever if he started yelling.
“ You act like your life will end without that shit.” he complained, his yelling slowly turning into a whine. “ What about me? Huh? Why can’t you pay as much attention to me as you do to that damn computer?” he took a breath, still staring at me.
“ Zac emailed me,” I replied meekly, still looking down. “ Said he’d be here in about a week to stay with us for a few days.” I looked out the window, something I seemed to always do when Taylor and I talked.
“Oh,” he said quietly. “I, I um, I didn’t know you were just checking your email.” he said, placing his hand on my cheek and pushing it to where I was facing him. “ I’m sorry sweets.” SCORE! He thought I was just checking my email. I stifled a laugh, looking out the window once more.
“ It’s fine,” I said, hoping he would go back to working out. When he did, I sighed. Sometimes he could get carried away with his whining and complaining. I wished with everything I had in me that he could just come to terms with the fact that I loved fanfic about him. It wasn’t my fault, we all had our addictions. His was herbal cigarettes, Cloves to be exact. And mine was fanfic. The sooner he realized that, the better off he and I would both be, I thought to myself. I decided to just stop reading for the day, or at least the time being. Instead I found our checkbook and began filing through the drawers of the desk, looking for all of the bills for that month. I sighed, as I reached into the bottom drawer to my left to pull out the envelope that held our phone bills from the months past. Just as I sat it down on the desk and pulled my hand away I felt a stinging sensation on my middle finger. I looked down to notice the red blood beginning to surface to the top layer of skin. A paper cut. How perfect. I jumped up out of the desk chair, feeling the tingle and then the heat rise up my face as I started down the hall to the weight room.
"Taylor," I sobbed, trying my best to not freak out. See I'm not one for blood, even a tiny little drop, especially when its my own.
"Yea?" he questioned standing up and walking towards me as I did some sort of pathetic dance to keep my mind off of my finger and the blood.
"Papercut." I sobbed, still jumping. He stifled a laugh, apparently he thought it was funny that I was so scared of blood, and pulled me into the the hall and down to the bathroom. I sat there as he pulled the box of bandages out of the medicine cabinet above the sink. Ten seconds later he was finished putting a bandaid on my poor middle finger and had kissed the tip of it.
"There sweets," he said, kissing it one more time. "All better." He said, smiling at me and then leaning in to place a small kiss on my forehead.
"Thanks," I said, still feeling a bit warm, and smiled at him from where I sat on the end of the tub. I sighed as we walked back out into the hallway. I turned to walk back to the leaving room just as he grabbed my arm and spun me back around. He planted a small kiss on my lips, slowly making it a bit more passionate. He began sucking on my lower lip after a few seconds, knowing this drove me crazy. I accepted his advance to deepen the kiss, and moaned a little into his mouth as he continued to gently suck on my lower lip. A few minutes later we broke the kiss, both gasping for air a little. He smiled at me, giving me a little wink, and then turned to walk back into the weight room. With that I sighed yet again and made my way back to the living room.